


Santa Baby

by thelotusflower



Category: South Park
Genre: Bickering, Canon Compliant, Christmas, Dialogue Heavy, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Post-Canon, idk what this even is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:48:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28319967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelotusflower/pseuds/thelotusflower
Summary: He decided it was the most humiliating day of his life as he stood in front of Tweek Bros Coffee with a Santa suit and fake beard on. He thought when he turned 17, his parents would maybe stop controlling him so much, but sadly, he was mistaken.OrTweek is forced to dress like Santa to promote business at Tweek Bros and Craig makes fun of him.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak
Comments: 8
Kudos: 54
Collections: dec 2020 - sp creek server does holidays / winter





	Santa Baby

**Author's Note:**

> MERRY CHRISTMAS GUYS THIS IS SO DUMB BUT ENJOY

He decided it was the most humiliating day of his life as he stood in front of Tweek Bros Coffee with a Santa suit and fake beard on. He thought when he turned 17, his parents would maybe stop controlling him so much, but sadly, he was mistaken.

He texted Craig to not come by today, to which he said _why_ to, to which Tweek said, _because it’s busy and I don’t wanna be distracted,_ to which Craig, _I’m distracting huh? ;)_ to which Tweek said, _shut uppp, im serious._ Afterward, Craig stopped answering, and Tweek sent him a question mark, which was a huge mistake because Craig said, _if its so busy how are you texting me?,_ to which Tweek said, _im just wondering what has you so busy that you can’t text me back,_ to which Craig said, _nothing because you told me not to come visit you._

Tweek rolled his eyes at the last one and has yet to answer it. He should probably give the illusion that they are busy which they certainly are not with their _two_ customers — one being someone who has been here the last two hours and the other his mom’s friend who stopped by to chat and grab a coffee.

His parents were _convinced_ that if he dressed up like Santa Claus, it would drag in more customers. The logic just wasn’t there, nor would it _ever_ be with them. Maybe that’s why he liked Craig so much. He was logical. Logical was completely absent in his household so he was desperate to be around someone who had it.

Although, he probably had spoken too soon. Thirty minutes later, the exact person he told not to come appeared in the distance. He frowned at the sight. He thought of heading inside the store in avoidance, but then he would just have to see and deal with his parents, and that was _not_ happening. So, instead he just stood and waited the inevitable.

As soon as Craig saw him within the short distance, a smile stretched wide across his face. He was holding onto a tin box. He stepped forward jovially, almost with a _spring_ in his step. It actually kind of pissed him off because why didn’t he _always_ appear this happy to see him?

Craig chuckled as he stepped closer, eyeing him up and down. “Why hello, Santa, have you seen my boyfriend? I think he is on the naughty list for being a liar.”

Tweek shifted his voice so it was deeper. “No. But he is actually on the nice list, and you are on the naughty list because you do not listen to your boyfriend.”

“Well. I brought some cookies that Tricia and my mom made for him, but maybe I’ll just give them to you instead to try to get on the nice list,”

“Santa likes cookies,” Tweek said in his impression-voice, taking the tin box, and opening it to reveal the different assortments of sugar, peanut butter and chocolate chip cookies. “He will consider a change once he does his second check.”

They both fell into a chuckle and Tweek’s façade broke and he closed the tin box can. “Why am I _not_ surprised you didn’t help them?” he asked in his normal tone.

“Why am _I not_ surprised this place isn’t busy, and that was just some lame excuse to make me miss out on _this?”_

“It _was_ busy…,” Tweek lied, shifting his gaze towards the door had been closed so long that he wouldn’t be surprised if it was frozen shut now. “It just cleared out.”

“Yeah, like 15 years ago,”

Tweek laughed in spite of himself as he turned to face Craig again. He pulled the beard down so it fell just below his chin, “and that was also the last time you ever did as you were told? Why do you always have to be so defiant?”

“I doubt that when I was _two,_ I did what I was told,”

“Okay, so then you just _never_ have,”

“And I’m glad I didn’t because other wise I would have missed this,” he gestured him up and down in the Santa outfit. Tweek shook his head and looked away with a hard glare.

“It’s so _stupid._ I look _so stupid._ My parents are —,”

“Stupid?”

“Yes, and so are you,” Tweeek huffed out, shifting his glare to his boyfriend in front of him. He tapped his nails alongside the tin box.

“I’ve seen you in a ton of different costumes, honey. You’re in _theatre.”_

“It’s different. I choose to wear that stuff in theater — and it’s not me just awkwardly standing outside of my dumb parents coffee shop!”

“Then let’s go,” Craig grabbed his free hand. They mindlessly laced them together and Tweek softened slightly.

“I can’t just go.”

“Of course you can. What are they going to do? Fire you? That would be the dream.”

Tweek shook his head and smiled, looking adrift. “More like ground me, or give me an hour long lecture on the importance of small family-run business and how it somehow will end up with me in a prison gang if I abandon it.” Craig’s face contoured, and Tweek sighed in response, “exactly.”

“I’m sure they won’t care if you want to spend the day with your boyfriend,”

“That stopped working when were were 12.”

Craig frowned, “I’m going to go tell them that I’ll break up with you if you do not come hang out with me, and then they will go onto full on panic mode, and let you go.”

Tweek considered this. His parents were honestly so emotionally driven that that just might work, but still, “no. That’s also just somehow going to end up in an hour long lecture. My best advice is to just leave me alone to die and wallow in my own self pity and humiliation.”

Craig stared blankly and pursed his lips to the side. “Okay,” he stated as he began to turn away, his hand nearly slipping from his boyfriend’s grip.

“Craig, wait, no,” Tweek held onto him so he couldn’t leave.

Craig turned back to him with a grin and said, “I’m was just kidding, sweets.” He pressed the back of his gloved hand to Tweek’s cheek. Craig moved his hand down and tousled his hair in the cheap plastic beard below Tweek’s chin. In response, Tweek glared at him, his glare only intensifying as Craig used his other hand to pull the beard up where it was supposed to on Tweek’s face.

Craig pat the side of Tweek’s face and said, ”groom yourself, babe, ” to which the blonde rolled his eyes and grunted to.

”I hate you, and I do want you to leave now.”

Craig chuckled and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, pressing his chin on his shoulder. ”I thought Santa Claus would be nicer.”

”You thought wrong, ” Tween retorted, reluctantly wrapping his arms around the other male. He still held onto the tin box and pressed it against Craig’s back as he held him. The quiet hum of _The First Noel_ played in the background behind the glass window of Tweek Bros Coffee.

Tweak let out a soft sigh as he pulled away slightly to turn his head to Craig’s. His hazel eyes were lit up with joy and his small smile almost made his smart-ass comments tolerable. He leaned forward and brushed their lips together in a gentle and chaste kiss. Craig reciprocated the kiss and pulled away with a small dorky laugh, ”your beard tickles.”

”Now you know how I feel when you let your stubble grow out, ” Tweek stepped away from the embrace but swiped a finger against his barren chin, making the dark-haired male’s smile inch farther.

”You love it,”

”I do. But it still tickles, ” Tweek argued. ”But I am mad you shaved.”

”There is no pleasing you, ” Craig joked.

”Shut up, ” Tweek responded with a smile. ”You look great either way, and you always please me.”

Craig beamed at him as he stepped closer and tousled his his fingers in the white beard, ”you look great, all the time.” He declared. ”I’m mad that you were trying to deprive me from seeing you in this.”

Tweak chortled, ”I do _not_ look good in this.”

”You look fucking amazing, baby,” Craig argued, ”its sexy.”

Tweak flushed and shook his head with a snicker. He looked to the blanket of thick snow on the ground, ”you’re ridiculous, man.”

”No, I’m not, a lot of people would agree with me, ” he stepped forward and attached his hands to the blonde’s hips. He spoke into his ear, his lips ghosting against it as he sang softly (and _badly)_ , ”Santa baby, I’ve been an awful good boy, Santa baby, hurry down the chimney tonight.”

Tweak laughed and shoved him away, ”you are _not_ into this – I don’t believe you.”

“I am into anything you do,” he smirked.

Tweek blushed again and ducked his head down. “Okay, well, I’m burning this after wearing, so you better just get a good visual and fix that need yourself.”

“I may just have to if you’re going to put me down like this,” Craig pouted.

“I feel _so_ bad for you,” Tweek mocked, with the corner of his lip angling upward.

“You should. I thought Santa was giving.”

“Santa is _tired_ and wants to retire.”

“How much longer do you have to do this for?”

Tweek shrugged, glancing at the inside of the coffee shop. “Until I somehow save the business, or until Christmas is over.”

“Okay, so the 26th ?”

“Yeah,” Tweek laughed.

“Well, what about today?”

“Are you really asking? You know how my parents are — until whenever they close up. Who knows when that will be.”

Craig frowned, always annoyed over Tweek’s parents and how they controlled him. “Well, wanna come over after?”

“Sure, but I’m _not_ wearing this,”

Craig frowned but his eyes lit up, “fine, I’ll get over it… I guess.” A smile elicited on his face with the words.

“You better,” Tweek mumbled back with the same sparkle in his eyes.

Craig smiled and leaned forward to give his boyfriend a chaste kiss. “I’ll see you later, then. I love you.”

“Love you too,” Tweek murmured as his boyfriend pulled away. He watched him walk away and let out a sigh. As humiliated as he was, he was glad his boyfriend paid him a visit.

  
  
  



End file.
